Resolutions Schmesolutions…

Terri Wingham is the founder and CEO of A Fresh Chapter, a cancer survivor, and someone who believes that we are not defined by the most difficult aspects of our story.

Written by Terri Wingham | January 3, 2012

When the alarm blared in your ear this morning, were you tempted to rip the plug from the wall and throw the clock (ipod charging and all) to the far side of the room? Or maybe, you are one of those chronic “snoozers” and you snoozed so long that you showed up late on your first day back at work (pillow creases still grooved into your forehead)?

It’s Day 3 of 2012 and already the 2-day hangovers have dissipated, the Christmas lights are  disappearing from the houses on my friend’s street, and everyone is slipping back into the busyness of life.

How’s it going with those New Year’s Resolutions of yours? Is 2012 the year you will end your long term relationship with Suzy Saddlebags & Paula Paunch? The 12 months where you will drink green tea every single day or finally admit to yourself that using a glass of Shiraz to suppress your anxiety about your job, your boyfriend, or your budget is not a great strategy (ahh, when will I ever learn…)?

I’ve always sucked at keeping New Year’s Resolutions, so I gave up making them years ago. I don’t know about you, but as soon as someone tells me I HAVE to do ____________, I lose interest (even if the person bossing me around is me).

But last year, a little article by Martha Beck shifted my perspective on resolutions and quite literally changed my life. Sounds dramatic, doesn’t it? But, if you have been around for awhile, you know how choosing my three words for 2011: healthy, loved, and inspired led me down the garden path (or whatever path it was) to a brand new life. If you read my Hell Yes post, you know how thinking about what would INSPIRE me led to a volunteer trip in Africa and put the wheels in motion for my upcoming (equal parts terrifying and exciting) Adventure of Hope.

With the start of a New Year, I have thought a lot about what bright and shiny word I want to choose for 2012. You see, late last year, I thought my word might be FREEDOM. But, here’s the thing…you should be careful what you wish for. I have never felt more FREE in my life. With no home, job, boyfriend, or family of my own, I have absolutely zero attachments. Are there perks that come with this freedom? Absolutely. But, do I want to live with this kind of zero-attachments-freedom forever? Absolutely not.

So instead, I’ve decided that in 2012, I want to cultivate CONNECTION. I know – pass the patchouli and let’s all sing “Kumbaya”. But, in all seriousness…one week from today, I will search in the bottom of my new rolling duffle bag (who knew trying to wear a travel backpack post mastectomy and reconstruction would be such a painful idea) for my Big Girl Panties and then board a flight to Hong Kong, en route to Vietnam. Then, you and I will spend the next six months traveling around the world, volunteering on almost every continent.

So, how does my big word for 2012 fit in? Well, I believe that this trip is about more than “just” international volunteering and more than “just” cancer survivorship; it’s about CONNECTION. It’s about moments like when I was there to bathe and care for a scared little boy in the Townships of Cape Town and he was there to remind me of how far I’d come since my double mastectomy. It’s about having the opportunity to share stories about these global connections with you. Stories about the resilience of the human spirit and about families who come from the most meagre of circumstances but still have hope for a better tomorrow. And just maybe, this trip is a reminder for me (and hopefully for you) that the past does not define us. Whether our story used to be cancer, a failed relationship, or a lost job, it’s never too late to write a new one.

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Comments (11)
  • Marie Ennis-O'Connor (@JBBC) • January 6, 2012

    Connection is a wonderful choice for the coming year Terri – there are many levels to this word and I just know that you will bring them all to life!

  • Weekly Round-Up « • January 6, 2012

    […] of, and chosen instead to focus on three words to guide and inspire us during the coming year.  Terri has chosen to let “connection” be her guiding word, and shares a little of how last […]

  • Terri Wingham • January 7, 2012

    Thanks Marie! I love your word for this year too.

  • Cathy Wiseman • January 8, 2012

    Hey Terri – Finally got a chance to catch up on all your recent posts. Wow! What an amazing read and an unbelievable 6 months you have ahead of you. I am so excited for you. You are an inspiration and I look forward to following you on this journey.

    You mentioned in “The Secret of Success” post that you’re going to 6 continents. Does that mean you’re hitting Australia (or are you going to Antarctica)?

    Wishing you and your “big girl panties” all the best as you fly on your way. Sending you much love. Xx

  • Terri Wingham • January 8, 2012

    Hi!
    Thank you so much for your comment. It is always such a pleasure to hear from you and I’m so happy to have you along for the ride as I set off on the next big adventure. It was originally supposed to be 6 continents (including Australia), but the timeline/budget didn’t work. Next trip I’m coming to Australia for sure! Thank you for your support and I look forward to keeping in touch along the way.
    Huge hugs!
    T
    xo

  • My First Travel Fiasco & It Only Took 24 Hours… | A Fresh Chapter • January 12, 2012

    […] Panic rises in my chest. What if I NEVER get this sorted and I’m stuck in the Hong Kong airport for the rest of my life? For the first (and I’m sure not the last) time on this trip, I wish desperately that I could see a friendly face. I look around for someone to save me from breaking into the ugly cry, but no one is there. Pre-sob, I catch myself as I remember the second word I have chosen for 2012: CALM. […]

  • Marisol Jensen • January 12, 2012

    I solute you, thank you and want to encourage you on your journey. I just happen to come upon your blog through seeing your post on Pueblo Ingles Facebook page. Quite interesting and inspirational. Even more of a coincidence that I too have been doing motto’s or inspirational words as my new year’s resolution. I started when I realized that every year was ‘the year’ I would loose weight or some other strict promise to myself that left my spirit deflated by March. And let me tell you that you are absolutely correct; ever since I left those restrictive resolutions for encouraging motto’s my life has simply been getting better and better.

    I wish you simply the best on your journey.

  • Terri Wingham • January 14, 2012

    Marisol,
    Thank you SO Much for your comment and our support. So happy to connect with you. I wish you the very best for 2012 too!
    Terri

  • Connection in Costa Rica… | A Fresh Chapter • June 10, 2012

    […] we approach the mid-year point, I can’t help but think about how your support has helped my 2012 Resolution Schemsolution come true. The beauty of the connections I have made with people on five different continents […]

  • Margi • June 10, 2012

    Funny that I’m reading this 6 months later and the reason I’m reading it is because of CONNECTIONS. Way to be your own visionary, and to find ways to encourage those around you to do the same.

    My guiding word for this year has been BALANCE.

    Love and miss you!!

  • Our ‘Karma Challenge’ Begins… | A Fresh Chapter • January 8, 2013

    […] though I have not written the annual Oprah or Martha Beck inspired What Are Your Three Words or Resolutions Schmesolutions post, I couldn’t resist weaving a little “live your best life” into […]

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