I took a slow sip from the hotel room glass and relished the warmth of the tangy red wine as it ran down my throat. My arms tingled and my toes loosed their grip on the carpet.

I had met D only 15 minutes ago when we struck up a conversation after one of the conference sessions and she had then invited me up to her room for a pre-dinner drink. Now she looked at me intently and bluntly offered to show me her breasts. I took a second gulp and suggested that maybe I finish my glass of wine first. We looked at each other and doubled over in laughter.

It didn’t take long before other women started knocking on the door and the room began to buzz with stories of surgery, low libido, chemo, baldness and drug-induced psychosis. We instantly related to the challenges that came with our unwilling membership to the same club. A glass and a half of wine later, three of us opened our tops. We compared the differences between diep, tram flap, and tissue expander reconstruction. I hadn’t factored in this version of ‘show and tell’ when I signed up for the Body, Mind, Spirit breast cancer survivor conference.

Although I kept my shirt on for the rest of the weekend, I continued to connect with women from all over the country. I heard many stories of strength and courage, especially from women fighting through reoccurrence. I learned about advocating to government, managing infertility, and telling your personal story.

On the second day, I attended a session called Management of BRCA1/2. A genetics doctor reminded me about all of the things I should do to help manage my substantial risk. Remove my breasts (check), remove my ovaries (thanks for the reminder), avoid smoking (check), get pregnant earlier in life (why not rub a little more salt in the wound?), eat a healthy diet (working on it) and avoid alcohol (are you crazy?) I am trying to focus on moderation, but complete avoidance? I met a fellow BRCA carrier and we joked about our genetic curse. She said to me, ‘you an take away my tits and my ovaries, but you can’t take away my wine.’ Hallelujah sister!

Later that weekend, I sat in awe as Bif Naked spoke. I haven’t followed her music and didn’t know what to expect when a tiny, tattooed, black clad woman took the stage. She kept 350 of us captivated over a period of 90 minutes with her raw honesty, self-deprecation, and dark humour. By the end, I wanted to block her path out of the hotel and demand that we start sipping lattes together on Fourth Avenue in Vancouver. After all, we both live in the same city. Doesn’t that make me a good candidate for her new best friend? Thankfully, I reigned myself in.

Here is a link to an article that hi-lights some of her story. Bif Naked – A breast cancer survivor

I also heard Carol Ann Cole speak as well as had the opportunity to meet her personally. Her candour, feisty attitude, and poise instantly impressed me. As a former VP of Bell, she has conquered both the business and the survivor world. She has written three books, battled breast cancer twice, and founded her Comfort Heart charity that has raised over $1.5 million for cancer research: http://www.carolanncole.com/

As I met more and more survivors, I saw how differently each of us manages both the physical and emotional challenges of the disease. Like anything in life, I related more easily with some people than with others. I hope to forge new friendships with some of the women who shared my black humour and positive outlook.

Although I enjoyed my time in the concrete jungle of Toronto, I gratefully stepped off the plane in Vancouver last night. I valued the dialogue and information that I scrambled to absorb over the weekend. But, I am also happy to slip back into a world where I am about so much more than my breast cancer experience.