For me, midsummer typically signals an upcoming scan. Just as I am settling into the sunshine, allowing myself to let go and allow good old vitamin D to soak into my cancer ravaged body parts — I am faced with that nagging mortality issue again. Will I get to feel this sun on my face next summer? Or should I be trying to bottle it up because this may be my last? Living with a terminal illness is a constant exercise in humility. I often picture myself walking a very narrow balance beam making sure to soak in light and acknowledge dark in equal parts to strike that perfect harmony. 

One author that has been particularly impactful when navigating living while dying is Kate Bowler. She is an associate professor of the history of Christianity in North America at Duke Divinity School and a stage IV cancer patient. Bowler brings a unique perspective to her work due to her strong faith and religious background. However, her faith doesn’t cloud her work; instead Bowler delivers with a strikingly unique approach. She’s a straight shooter who avoids toxic positivity. She doesn’t shy away from pain but instead embraces it as what it is — hard and a part of being human. There’s something soothing about acknowledging this truth without trying to sugarcoat it. Check it out: No Cure for Being Human (And Other Truths I Need to Hear)  www.katebowler.com

If the patient perspective to living in between isn’t what you are looking for, check out Dr. Atul Gawande’s Being Mortal (Medicine and What Matters in the End). Dr. Gawande writes about modern medicine’s limitations when it comes to end of life decision-making. This book has had a profound impact on how I have viewed palliative treatment choices throughout the past twelve years I have lived with terminal cancer. Understanding these choices through the lens of a renowned surgeon is refreshing. More noteworthy is the idea that Gawande found the suffering in end-of-life care in American medicine worth researching, worth trying to improve. Check it out here: www.atulgawande.com

As a patient, a mom, a wife, a daughter, a sister, Tallu Shuyler Quinn’s posthumously published book What We Wish Were True: Reflections on Nurturing Life and Facing Death spoke to every single role I fulfill on this earth. Quinn was a food justice activist and founder of the Nashville Food Project. Her life was cut short by glioblastoma (an aggressive, terminal brain cancer) at just 41 years old in February 2022. The book highlights hope and grief through a series of essays in real time as Quinn grapples with her terminal illness. This is a heartbreakingly beautiful read that allows readers to understand what it means to live with a terminal illness and still find meaning and purpose. It’s almost as though Quinn is allowing us to walk her final steps with her where grief and gratitude are in harmony. The essays are a love letter to her life and to those she loves. Powerful. Check it out here. 

Stay tuned for next month’s post, which will feature brand-new resources to explore.

Kate is a member of several AFC circles. She is an avid reader who enjoys sharing exciting, new resources focusing on personal, professional, and spiritual growth. Kate is a freelance writer residing in Northeast Wisconsin with her husband and three teenage children.